


Punch Drunk

by GagNBagThisNaziMuffin



Category: STV - Fandom, Star Trek, Star Trek Voyager, Star Trek: Voyager, VOY - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Bondage, Boxing, Crazy, Doctor - Freeform, Emo, Fetish, Hot, Hurt, Hurt Chakotay, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Making Out, Naughty, Nurse - Freeform, Nurse Back To Health, Porn, Punch Drunk, Romance, Sad, Sex, Slash, angsty, crazy gene, hallucination, not safe for work, rescue romance, sickbay, softcore, strapped down, strapped to a biobed, the fight, tom takes care of chakotay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-14 04:11:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14127798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GagNBagThisNaziMuffin/pseuds/GagNBagThisNaziMuffin
Summary: Tag to Season 5's "the Fight." Voyager is out of Chaotic Space, but the Doctor and Tom still need to fix Chakotay's "crazy gene." Apparently, the solution is bondage.





	Punch Drunk

**Author's Note:**

> Another oldie. I took this off my FF. net account because it's gratuitous and embarrassing, but it is admittedly some nice angsty slash. So here you go.

After Voyager flew free from Chaotic Space, Chakotay was still hallucinating, as he sagged in the grasps of the captain and the Doctor. He was too heavy to carry to sickbay, and transporters still weren't fully functional, so the Doctor ordered a handful of greenshirts to come up with a stretcher. Tom Paris watched the captain and the Doctor set Chakotay in a sitting position against the wall, near the turbo lift, Chakotay blinking dizzily. He babbled about not being able to take any more punches, and voiced concern for the "other guy," asking if he'd knocked him out or done any serious damage.

"Captain," Tom said, "Request permission to leave the bridge and assist in sickbay?"

Janeway glanced at the viewscreen, as if to confirm that Voyager was indeed back in normal space, and then nodded. "Granted." She tapped her com badge, and called Ensign Jenkins to take Tom's place at the helm.

Jenkins stepped out of the turbo lift with the medical team. Tom left his seat and to help lie Chakotay down on the stretcher. It took effort to stay professional, as he and the Doc helped carry him down to sickbay. Tom feared he'd already crossed the line once or twice in the last few days. The incident that stuck most in Tom's mind was when Chakotay had been delusional, and Tom volunteered to restrain him, pressing against his chest with one arm. Chakotay seizing Tom's arm with both hands, pleading to the Doctor to get the voices out of his head, while pleading to Tom with his body language to keep him safe. Shortly after that, Chakotay's fear had turned to rage, and Tom's attempts to comfort him had earned him a punch in the nose. After that the Doctor had sent Tom and Seven of Nine out of sickbay, to work with the commander alone. Tom knew the Doctor had his suspicious about him and Chakotay, but it was clear that this last incident had outright confirmed them.

"I won," Chakotay slurred, as they moved him onto the biobed. "I won the fight?"

Tom smiled, as if he had a clue what Chakotay was talking about. "Yeah," he rubbed Chakotay's arm. "You did great."

The Doctor didn't look at Tom, but the hologram's eyebrows moved for a split second, in a way that told Tom, I see what you did there. The Doctor thought Tom was going behind B'Elanna's back, with these feelings and actions. Up till now Tom had thought it was none of the Doc's business. But if they'd be working together in sickbay for the rest of the journey, then maybe at some point, Tom should clear a few things up for him. Eh, later.

The Doctor began programming a long thin medical tool, and leaned over Chakotay, speaking slowly and clearly. "I'm going to cure your fever now. That should reduce the hallucinations." He began moving the tool over Chakotay's forehead. "After that I'll try to shut off the gene. Do you understand?"

Chakotay stared up at the Doctor under half-closed eyes.

"Fever?" Tom looked at the Doctor under his eyebrows.

The Doctor looked regretful. "I subjected him to a fever to heighten the hallucinations. It was necessary to make the communication as clear as possible."

Tom put three fingers over Chakotay's tattoo (the Doctor had moved to the other side of his forehead), and felt Chakotay's head burning. A few of the other medical crewman stared, then quickly looked away. They were standing around with nothing to do.

"You're dismissed," the Doctor said to the crewmen. "Thank you."

Even with the fever gone and the aliens washed clean from his head, Chakotay was still delirious, and not just from stress.

After scanning him, the Doctor slowly closed his tricorder. "They've left him with the Tremens disorder."

Chakotay blinked, hearing the Doctor's words. Whether the understood them or not, Tom had no idea.

"Meaning what," Tom looked up. "We can't cure him? He's just gonna be like this for the rest of…?"

"Not if I can help it." The Doctor was now examining Chakotay's DNA on the screen, holding his fist to his chin thoughtfully. "There's no known cure for people born with Sensory Tremens, only treatments…but the commander wasn't born with it. If I can find a way to reverse what they've done, send his genetics back to the way they were before we entered Chaotic Space…"

For at least an hour, they bounced off ideas on how to send Chakotay's DNA back to its previous state, while Chakotay drifted in and out of consciousness. They had nothing. Then Tom, out of frustration, made some comment like, "It's DNA! It's fixed where it's at! Unless there's a time portal nearby we can use to wind back history on Chakotay's genetics!"

The Doctor let out an agitated sigh, pacing around the room, rubbing his temples. Holograms didn't get headaches, but the Doc was programmed to express frustration with body language familiar to humans. And then his head shot up from his hands.

"Doc?" Tom asked.

"Wind back history…" The Doctor's eyes widened, until they were practically bulging. "Wind back history!"

Tom's blue eyes shifted. He looked back at Chakotay (asleep), then at the Doctor. "We can do that?"

"Maybe!" The Doctor dashed to the section of sickbay where he kept various supplies and medicine samples locked up.

Tom was beyond lost. "Since when?"

"Since two or three years ago," The Doctor began rummaging frantically. "When Kes presented me with one of the most intriguing medical mysteries I've ever encountered! Kes, you might recall, was having history 'wound back' on her body!"

Tom remembered, now. How Kes had interrupted a meeting in the briefing room, to announce that she was traveling backwards through her life. It had been caused by events from Kes's future. At some point in her life (points that had now been erased from the timeline), Kes had been exposed to temporal radiation from an alien attack (the Kremin, was it?). A few years later Kes had (or would have) been put in a chamber that the Doctor invented, to reverse the aging process on her body. The combination of the age-reversion and the temporal chemicals in her body had sent her spiraling backwards through her life, until the Doctor and B'Elanna had rebuilt the chamber with a few adjustments, and "froze" Kes at the current point in her life.

Tom tried to string it all together. "You wanna put Chakotay in a chamber like Kes, and rewind his DNA?"

"We won't need the chamber this time," The Doctor said, rummaging through his supplies. "Chakotay isn't traveling backwards in time like Kes was, so we won't need to temporally freeze him like we did with her." The Doctor finally pulled out a Petri dish. "I salvaged the leftover chronotron particles from the chamber after we treated Kes. I was hoping to present them to Starfleet, if and when Voyager returned to Earth. But," the Doctor cocked one eyebrow. "I suppose Chakotay's wellbeing trumps my own glory," he smiled humorously.

"Wait, you've had these particles this whole time," Tom squinted at the Doctor. "And you never thought to use them, to undo damage on anyone else, before now?"

"I don't have enough of them to affect anything physically major, like an injury or a disease. But something small, like DNA…"

Tom shook his head. "What? How does that….whaaat?"

The Doctor provided a long explanation, which Tom couldn't begin to understand. The Doc then tried to dumb it down for him, and Tom still didn't understand. Tom slowly nodded, not out of clarity, but acceptance. The time-particles could not affect Ensign Jetal's gun-wound, Neelix's plasma burns, or Kes's mental evolution, but they could affect Chakotay's DNA. Fine. So be it.

"So, so let me get this straight." Tom held up a hand, squinting again. "We're gonna put these…temporal particles, into Chakotay's DNA, and let them take his DNA back in time, to when his…" Tom looked back at Chakotay a moment. "…his gene had still been turned off? And then…what? How do we make sure it won't send Chakotay backwards through is life like Kes?"

"Kes only went backwards in time because the particles were combined with my attempts to reverse her aging process. The particles themselves don't have any direction, forward or backward, in mind. When I inject them into Chakotay's DNA, they'll send it into temporal flux. That is to say, there will be points where it reverts to previous points in time, points where it looks like it might in the future (which should be no different, as DNA doesn't normally change), and points where it will look as it does now. As soon as his DNA looks the way we want it too, I'll give him a second injection that will destroy the temporal particles. It's chancy, but I don't see what we've got to lose."

Tom almost asked how the hell you destroyed temporal particles, but decided not to bother. If he ever decided to pursue a full-time career in the medical field, then he'd start asking more detailed questions.

"And after that…" Tom shook his head and shrugged, "…he'll be cured?"

"Not quite. With his DNA restored, he won't be vulnerable to any more damage from the Tremens disease. But the damage that's already there will remain. After I reverse his DNA, I'll start work on rebuilding the protein insulation on his optic and auditory nerves. That will cure the hallucinations. And that's the part that will take a while."

The problem arose from the fact that sedating Chakotay for the surgery wasn't an option. The Doctor wanted his brain clear of drugs before they began tampering with it. Which also ruled out neural suppressants, for the hallucinations. By now, Chakotay was awake again, staring at the ceiling, looking ill-tempered. Fortunately, he didn't have the energy to be too disruptive. Yet.

"I can perform both procedures myself," The Doctor said quietly. He and Tom stood in his office, watching Chakotay. "I'm going to restrain him. If you'd been here while he was communicating with the aliens you'd understand," he added wearily. "You'll have the usual duties as nurse." The Doc opened his mouth a moment, as if pondering how to word this next sentence. "Mr. Paris, you…have my permission to…use whatever methods come to your mind to pacify him. I don't want you to about what's 'necessary' or 'appropriate.' If it helps one or both of you relax,"

Tom listened with his arms folded. "I understand."

The Doctor contacted Captain Janeway to give her the update, and began gathering his tools.

Tom returned to Chakotay's side. "Hey."

Chakotay didn't look as upset as he'd been a while before, but he still seemed distant. Looking up at him, Chakotay said, "You didn't think I could do it."

Tom shrugged, playing along. "I was wrong."

Still speaking barely above a mumble, Chakotay said, "You tried to stop me….get me out on medical."

Tom squeezed Chakotay's shoulder again. "I was just worried about you. We all were, you know."

Tom's eyes drifted to the replicator, where he saw the Doctor programming the restraints. He was pulling up the same ones he'd used on Seven, when she'd lost it a month or two earlier. Come to think of it, a lot of people on Voyager had been going crazy lately…and maybe that knowledge would make Chakotay feel better.

"Is she worried about me?" Chakotay grumbled, almost irritably.

"Who?" Tom asked.

Chakotay was staring at a nonexistent visitor, on the other side of his bed.

Improvising, Tom said, "I can't see. My, uh, eyesight…has been having problems." Squinting at the empty space, Tom added, "I think I can see someone, but you'll need to—"

"It's Seska." Chakotay said flatly.

Oh, shit.

"What's she doing?" Tom slid his hand over Chakotay's and squeezed.

Squeezing back, Chakotay answered, "She just told me it was lovely to see me ag—" he cringed and moved his head, as if Seska was touching him.

Tom quickly put his free hand over that side of Chakotay's face, "blocking" Seska. The Doctor was headed back to the biobed, pushing his tray of tools. Tom moved Chakotay's head to face him.

"Chakotay listen to me," Tom made sure he had eye contact, and hoped that meant Chakotay was taking in what he said. "You were hurt in your fight. You have a brain injury. You're in sickbay being treated. Understand?"

Chakotay thought it over. He looked over at the Doctor a moment, and narrowed his eyes. Tom tightened his grip on Chakotay's hand, and the rest of him tensed.

"I'm punch-drunk? That's what you're saying?"

"Yes!" Tom threw his head back with relief. "Yes, exactly. Listen Chakotay," Tom leaned closer, and turned Chakotay's face back to his. "Seska is dead. You're hallucinating. We're about to give you an operation. That'll make Seska…that'll get rid of her." When Chakotay didn't respond, Tom pushed, "You follow?"

Chakotay gave a small but quick nod, glancing back for a second at "Seska." "She won't go quietly. She doesn't want to stay dead," Chakotay's black eyes hopped around the room, and landed on another invisible figure. As if some new anger were welling up inside, he whispered, "That bastard doesn't want to either."

"Too bad for them." Tom shrugged.

The Doctor stopped at the bed, and made eye contact with Tom. He was pulling the straps out from the bottom part of the tool tray. Tom had to make a split-second decision, whether to warn Chakotay, or try to distract him and hope he didn't notice. He chickened out and chose the latter.

"Who's the other guy?" Tom asked Chakotay, keeping his face turned away from the Doctor.

The Doctor, as discretely as he could, fastened one end of the restraints to the frame of the biobed, and moved them over Chakotay's ankles. Chakotay didn't seem to notice. He leaned in towards Tom, his eyes moving away from the person he was hallucinating.

"My grandfather." He answered, and the Doctor looked up for a moment. "The one who was so kind to give me this crazy gene."

"It's not his fault," Tom said, but Chakotay cut him off.

"And he also was nice enough to demonstrate it for me." Chakotay's voice was rising, making Tom nervous. "Making himself a burden on the whole family, frightening Sekaya and me, because he was too proud to take a couple of hyposprays a day."

"Shh," Tom gently took Chakotay's other hand with his free one, and moved it down to his side, letting the Doctor move the straps over his arms and chest.

Chakotay almost shot up from the bed, stopped only by the restraints. "You apologize, you son of a bitch!" he spat at his "grandfather."

"I'll need you to hold his head for me, Tom," the Doctor said, moving around the bed.

Tom timidly took a hold of Chakotay's head with both hands. Chakotay jerked his head a couple times, trying to shake him off. Out of ideas, Tom dove into the commander's mouth with a kiss. The shock of it made Chakotay freeze. And then, remembering, Chakotay kissed back, as if they'd done this just yesterday, instead of who knew how long ago.

The Doctor raised his eyebrows and muttered, "Unusual, but effective."

Tom slowly broke off the kiss. "Now hold still, so the Doc can treat you. And they'll be gone. 'Kay?"

Chakotay stared past Tom with glazed eyes. But apparently he'd heard him.

That first minute or two was the most intense. The Doctor injected the temporal particles with a hypospray, then immediately switched injectors to the one that would destroy them. The three of them watched the DNA on the screen, flickering and shifting, the Doctor holding the injector ready up to Chakotay's neck. There were moments where the DNA would "freeze" in one sequence for more than a few seconds. As soon as it did so in the form the Doctor wanted it, he jabbed Chakotay's neck again, pressing a different command that essentially dissolved the particles. The DNA stopped fluctuating on the screen, and froze in place. The Doctor looked carefully at it, and then actually let out a short, triumphant laugh, that made Tom and Chakotay both jump.

"We did it!" The Doctor exclaimed, grabbing the consol that displayed the DNA. He looked back at Tom, grinning wildly, then back at the screen. "We did it!"

Tom realized just how trying Chakotay's condition had been on the Doc. The poor hologram was probably starting to go a little crazy himself, after treating…who now? Chakotay, Seven, Tuvok, Tom himself, Tuvok again, Seven again, B'Elanna and Vorik, Tuvok again…

"It's off?" Chakotay stared at the screen wide-eyed, letting his head fall back on the pillow. "The crazy gene? It's turned off?"

"It's off!" The Doctor practically shouted, still staring at the screen in ecstatic disbelief.

Chakotay bit his lip, rising up against the restraints. "Then what the hell are Seska and Boothby and my Grandfather—"

The Doctor quickly turned around and knelt back over Chakotay. "You're neural pathways—"

"You've still got brain damage." Tom interrupted.

Tom threw the Doctor a come on! look. Chakotay needed to be spoken to in plain English. The Doctor understood, and backed off.

"Mr. Paris will explain the rest for you," the Doctor said, and began preparing for the next operation.

Leaning back over Chakotay, Tom said quietly, "The Doc just fixed your DNA. The gene's turned off. But the damage it did to you is still there. He's gonna fix that now. We need you to hold still again."

Chakotay nodded, grinding his teeth, and settled back against the bed. Tom tried to keep Chakotay in the real world by talking to him. He started by giving him "updates" on how the ship was faring, and what B'Elanna, Harry and the others had been up to the last few days. Then he managed to steer the subject to "Captain Proton," and started telling Chakotay about the adventure he, Harry, Captain Janeway and the Doc had been treated to a few weeks earlier, when they battled Chaotica. Chakotay enjoyed the story, but kept glancing back at his hallucinations, twice telling them to shut up.

"Ignore them," Tom tried. "Just let me finish the story, all right?"

Chakotay remained still for the moment, but then glared back at thin air and snarled, "Respect for the dead…I was relieved when we finally dumped you into that mound!"

Tom stared at Chakotay, his mouth hanging slightly opened. Hearing Chakotay—Chakotay—saying something like that to anyone, much less his own grandfather, felt like being stabbed in the chest. This disease had long since made off with Chakotay's mind, and now it was eating away at his soul. Tom started to feel numb.

Chakotay's eyes widened slightly, with a combination of fear and rage. "…just like they'll all be glad to be rid of me."

"Chakotay!" Without thinking, Tom grabbed Chakotay's shoulders and gave him a shake.

"Paris!" The Doctor exclaimed, pulling his medical tool up quickly.

"Sorry," Tom said, then turned back to their patient. "Chakotay listen to—look at me!" Tom held Chakotay's head firmly against the pillow, giving the Doctor the stability needed to repair his brain. "How many people on this ship have gone crazy? In the last year? Did you wanna kill Seven of Nine, when she was running around the ship, with all those personalities? Was she just such a pain in the ass when she was crazy that it wasn't worth putting up with, until we found a cure? ...Well?"

Chakotay looked away, his eyes darting as he thought it over.

"How 'bout the guy operating on you right now?" Tom jerked his head at the Doctor, but kept his eyes on Chakotay's. "Remember when he had to choose, between Ani Jetal and Harry Kim? He lost it after that, twice. Remember?"

Chakotay nodded, looking like a child who was taking a scolding.

Tom softened his voice and his touch. "You want me to count all the times Tuvok's gone crackers? Let's see, his mind-meld with Crewman Suder, the alien possession back in Year One, plus that fake memory of that little girl …B'Elanna and Vorik in Pon Faar, Seven going Borg-happy last year when we found her parents' shuttle…Hell." Tom sighed and looked away, deciding that yes, he'd go ahead and say it: "I fucked our captain, and made three mutant lizard babies with her." Tom looked back at Chakotay. "You think having a few hallucinations is worse than turning into a speed-lizard and procreating with your superiors? And spending the rest of your life knowing that there are three mutant amphibians in a swamp in the Delta Quadrant with your DNA in them? Wanna trade?"

Chakotay dropped his head inward towards Tom's embrace, and gave an almost-silent chuckle. The Doctor leaned awkwardly to the left, following Chakotay's head with his tools, trying not to lose his place.

Tom saw that agonized expression come over Chakotay's face again, the one that always twisted his heart in a knot. Chakotay mouthed, "I'm sorry," and his eyes began to water. "I miss you Grandfather." He blinked, letting a couple of tears roll down his cheeks.

Tom held Chakotay until he finally dozed off. He had some wicked nightmares, and Tom had to continue holding him still, even with the straps doing half the work. Tom realized, after a while, that he couldn't keep any of this a secret from B'Elanna. Aside from the fact that he couldn't lie to the woman he loved, there was also Chakotay being one of B'Elanna's oldest friends, and her having the right to know how he'd been cured. He might have to fess up to Harry too, but Harry probably wouldn't take it as personally as B'Elanna. Oh yeah, and the Doc. He should probably fill him in on what the hell was going on between all of them, so he didn't think his assistant was a horrible person. He decided to wait until the Doctor had finished the surgery.

The Doc finally set down his tools, and then began scanning Chakotay's brain. "I think we're finished," he said quietly.

Chakotay stared up at Tom and the Doctor, with clarity in his eyes. He still looked pretty awful—hair disheveled, dark circles under his eyes—but the eyes weren't glazed, and didn't seem to be seeing anything that wasn't there.

Gently, the Doctor asked, "Chakotay, how do you feel?"

Chakotay closed his eyes, apparently thinking his answer through. Then, with his eyes still closed, he said, "Kiss me."

The Doctor stared at Chakotay. Then his eyes drifted back down to the tricorder, filled with confusion and defeat. "But, but I repaired all of the protein insul—"

"I'm not delusional Doctor." Chakotay said calmly. "I was talking to Tom, not you." He smiled. "Nothing personal."

The Doctor glanced back at Chakotay, and then at Tom.

"Ah, Doc," Tom shifted where he stood over Chakotay, "Could ya give us a few moments?"

The Doctor stared at them, gave a small nod, and then headed for his office. As soon as his back was turned Tom gave Chakotay that kiss. He took a hold of Chakotay's shoulder with one hand, cupping the back of his head in the other. It was like riding a bicycle; their mouths and tongues moved on each other like they'd rehearsed it a hundred times, like they were still "together."

One thing was different this time. Chakotay wasn't holding or touching him back, with his hands or arms. Because they were still strapped down at his sides. Tom broke off the kiss, and moved to undo the restraints.

"Tom stop," Chakotay said quickly. "Not…not yet."

Tom's eyes widened. "You…" he dropped into a whisper. "You're into this?"

Kinkiness didn't faze Tom—when it was coming from B'Elanna. With the Klingon enthusiasm she showed in the bedroom, it surprised Tom more when she wanted to cuddle than when she wanted to play with cuffs or pain sticks. But Chakotay had never been that type—not when they had dated in the Maquis, and not during any of the spontaneous intimate moments they'd shared on Voyager. He'd rarely even let Tom play any kind of dominant role.

Keeping his voice low, Chakotay replied, "I don't know." He breathed heavily, looking at the ceiling. "I just spent so much…energy, trying to stay in control. I've been so afraid, to just, just let someone else…" After a silence, Chakotay apparently found what he was trying to say. "That entire fight, Tom, when I was communicating with the aliens…I was trying to, to get close to something, while fighting it off at the same time. And that moment when I finally gave up and stopped fighting, and let them swarm over my mind, and I realized they didn't want to hurt me, they were there to take care of me…there was no feeling in the world like it. I want it again."

Tom was staring at Chakotay, with a kind of confused shock. Because what he said was making a strange sort of sense. But it was still very, very bizarre to hear, in this context. Tom finally muttered, "Welcome to Psychology of Bondage, 101."

Chakotay's eyes shifted, and he made a tiny, admitting shrug. Glancing at the Doctor, he asked Tom, "Does he need to stick around, or can we have sickbay to ourselves for just a few minutes?"

Tom almost asked the Computer to deactivate the EMH. But after everything the Doc had just done for Chakotay—and by extension the entire crew—that wouldn't be right. At all.

"Doc," Tom made no effort to hide how awkward he felt asking this, "Maybe uh, Captain Janeway could use an update."

"I've just given her one." The Doctor said, furrowing his brow curiously.

"Well maybe some other people onboard have injuries that need looking at. Voyager took quite a beating," Tom shrugged. "Hell you've been locked up in sickbay for the last how many days, don't you wanna get out and stretch your legs for a—?"

"Hint taken, Mr. Paris." The Doctor stood and went to gather his med kit. "But please remember that this is my sickbay. Should anyone need it for its intended use, I'll expect you two to behave appropriately. And know that I'm only allowing this once, for Chakotay's sake…and because you did an exemplary job of keeping my patient pacified, Mr. Paris."

Taken aback, Tom said, "Thanks."

The Doctor nodded. "You're welcome."

Tom watched the Doctor leave, and sat there, staring at the closed doors.

"What are you waiting for?" Chakotay asked.

"Um, nothing," Tom turned back to Chakotay. "So do, um, you wanna talk?"

"Talk?!"

"W-well, you've been through a lot—"

"Later!" Chakotay hissed. "Come on Tom you started this! That first kiss, those touches,"

"I was just trying to calm you down!"

"Calm me down…good work." Chakotay said flatly, staring down at himself.

Tom followed Chakotay's gaze, and saw what he hadn't seen in a long time. "Oh." Tom looked away and nodded. "So, right now, I guess."

"Right now!"

Tom wasn't sure how to start. "Uh," he leaned over Chakotay again. "I'll um, I'll need some, uh,"

Chakotay arched his head back on the pillow. "Do whatever you want."

Tom looked over his shoulder, just to make absolute sure that they were alone. Then he gave Chakotay another long kiss, and simultaneously moved over him, onto the bed. There was a surreal feeling to all of this. Because while Chakotay had, on occasion, let Tom be on top, Tom had never been the one in control during their relationship. Tom had fought to be "the man," while Chakotay simply was "the man." Even when he'd saved Chakotay's life, in the caverns of Ocompa, Chakotay had still bantered and fought, refusing to just let Tom take care of him. To suddenly have Chakotay offer himself up to Tom, as a restrained "prisoner," letting Tom do whatever he wanted...

A new wave of excitement rolled up Tom's body, and he moved his hands from Chakotay's face down to his chest, still kissing him. He pulled up memories of all the things he knew Chakotay enjoyed, and made sure to employ them. Caressing his hair, kissing his neck, gnawing his ear…all just as welcome and effective as the last time they'd been together…what…a year ago? (Yes; after Chakotay was rescued from those aliens that tried to brainwash him into their war, that was the last time they'd made love). Chakotay rose against the restraints, and managed to bring up his forearms enough to grip Tom around the waist. Tom's hands slid down Chakotay's chest, to the jacket of his uniform. He tried to pull the jacket opened, but the straps complicated matters.

"Erm, Chakotay, how am I supposed to…"

"Be creative."

It took some artful handiwork, but Tom managed to have Chakotay's uniform jacket opened under the straps soon enough. He slid his hand down the thin gray material covering Chakotay's chest, then down his smooth stomach. His arms and chest were always toned muscles, but his gut was all "cushion." The best of both worlds. Tom had missed it all. Chakotay gasped, and tightened his grip on Tom. Tom slid his hand under the gray shirt, and moved up Chakotay's bare skin.

"Tom!" Chakotay gasped.

"Mmmm, Chakotay…"

"Tom, let me go!"

"Hmm?"

"Untie me!"

Tom shifted, glancing at the straps over Chakotay's elbows and legs. His jacket opened, shirt scrunched up to his chest. His hair still a mess, and overall still looking all kinds of exhausted and awful. He looked like he could use a hug.

"Already?" Tom asked, half jokingly. "What about that whole, 'fight for a while, then surrender' thing you were telling me about bef—"

"I just did that! I want to use my arms now!"

"Okay, okay!"

Tom reached over and undid the straps around Chakotay's legs, then his arms. As soon as he was free, Chakotay seized Tom around the back with both arms and yanked him down.

\--

Either the Doc actually did have a lot of work to do outside sickbay, or he'd decided to be a sentimental pushover and give Tom and Chakotay far more time than they'd really needed. In any case, Chakotay was asleep by the time the Doctor returned, and Tom had become fully clothed again. Chakotay's clothes were filthy—he'd been wearing the same uniform since his botched vision quest a few days ago—so Tom had removed them, and covered Chakotay under medical blanket. Tom was putting the tools away when the Doctor entered.

"I explained our procedure to the Captain, and told her I'd release Chakotay as soon as he felt well enough to leave." The Doctor said. "A few people asked if they could visit him. But I told them he needed some time to himself."

Awkwardly, Tom replied, "Thanks."

"Don't mention it."

"Believe me, I won't."

There was an awkward silence for a bit, while they continued putting the tools away.

"Doc,"

The Doctor glanced up.

"Since I've been your assistant for about a year now, I uh, I think I owe you a few explanations. About Chakotay…and…Harry….Just so you don't think I'm a horrible person."

"You don't have to explain anything to me, Mr. Paris. Your personal life is none of my business. I'm a doctor, not a morel advisor."

"B'Elanna knows about me and Harry. Harry and I, we've, we've been together on and off since," Tom shook his head. "Since the first year on Voyager to be honest." Tom looked back down at the tricorder he was holding. "I asked B'Elanna if she wanted me to stop, after we started dating. I love them both, but B'Elanna's the one who I really…"

The Doctor was staring at Tom sympathetically.

"Well anyway, she said she didn't give a targ's ass what I did with other men on board, but if I so much as looked at another woman she'd have me wearing my balls for a bowtie."

"I see," The Doctor said. "Frankly, I've never understood why gender should be related to fidelity. But what's important is that you and B'Elanna are happy. And Ensign Kim…"

"Harry's okay with it too. Believe it or not, he's the one who suggested an, uh, 'open relationship.'"

"I didn't realize Mr. Kim…batted for both teams. He always seemed so concerned over women,"

"That's because women are the tough project for Harry." Tom looked down, folding his arms. "When he's with me or Ayala or Andrews, Harry is the woman. But I think he sometimes wishes he could be the—"

"Ayala? Andrews?" The Doctor's eyes practically popped out of his holographic head. "Tuvok's two security guards?"

"Well, not anymore." Tom rambled on casually. "They both lost interest in Harry a few years ago, and just got stuck on each other."

"Isn't Mr. Ayala married?"

Tom nodded. "Yeah. And Andrews too. But he's a Mormon."

The Doctor was staring at Tom, still bug-eyed, with one eyebrow arched high.

"Anyway," Tom looked back at Chakotay, who still appeared to be out cold. "Chakotay and I, we go back. When we were in the Maquis. A few days before I got captured, we had a fight…"

The Doc's eyes swept around the room. "I always thought you two seemed like bitter former lovers, but I had no idea…"

"You're the only one." Tom sighed. "Even the captain noticed. She's made it clear to everyone, many times, that officers are not to bring up their lovers' quarrels on duty. The only reason B'Elanna and I get away with as much arguing as we do in public is because the captain goes a little easier on B'Elanna, for her Klingon temper."

"Are there many other," The Doctor's face scrunched nervously, "complicated relationships aboard this ship?"

Chakotay's voice suddenly cut in, "You don't even want to know, Doc."

Tom and the Doctor both turned to see Chakotay pushing himself up on his elbows, the blanket still covering him from the waist down.

"How are you still awake?" Tom exclaimed. "After the Doc kept you conscious for something like two days straight, talking to those aliens?"

"I don't know." Chakotay looked back and forth between Tom and the Doctor. "Maybe I got enough rest between you two sedating me and Tuvok knocking me out with the Vulcan neck pinch." Chakotay rubbed his forehead with one hand. "Tom, if B'Elanna or Harry…I'll tell them myself, if either of them..."

"No." Tom shook his head. "I'm the one…you weren't well. And you didn't have anyone."

Chakotay sighed, and muttered, "First Seska…then Kathryn rejects me…then Tuvok wanting to 'experiment' with no concern for my feelings,"

"Tuvok?!" The Doctor exclaimed.

"Tuvok." Tom confirmed, flatly.

The Doctor spun on his heel. "I'm going to finish up my medical log. If you're feeling better Commander, you're released."

Tom retrieved Chakotay's clothes from the cleaning bay in the wall, and turned around while he changed. Chakotay allowed Tom to be a gentleman and walk him back to his quarters, and they finished up their conversation on the way down the hall. Most everyone else was still busy making repairs, hurrying down the halls, many multitasking at PADDs or giving reports to each other. But everyone who passed Chakotay told him how good it was to have him back. Tom waited until they were in an empty hall to ask the most personal question on his mind—the one concerning Chakotay's grandfather.

"…your parents couldn't just…give him his medicine, whether he wanted it or not?"

"They could," Chakotay sighed. "There were a few times…But my father said that his grandfather had managed through it without medicine. He thought we all relied too much on modern technology. He thought it'd be better for my sister and I to grow up dealing with it, instead of just sheltering us."

Tom didn't hide how horrified he was. "So he just let his own dad…?"

Chakotay's jaw clenched for a moment. "My father and I had a lot of disagreements. I should be over them all by now."

Tom searched for something to say in response.

Before he got the chance, B'Elanna suddenly came around the corner, and stopped when she saw them. She gave her old Maquis commander a careful look. "Chakotay?"

"I'm alright B'Elanna." Chakotay looked like he was about to add something else, probably something sarcastic about not being "crazy," but stopped himself.

B'Elanna barreled into him with a tight hug. Sounding on the verge of tears, she said, "I heard you over the com the other day. When I was on the bridge, and the captain called the Doctor for an update. I felt so guilty for not being there, after everything you've done for me."

"It's alright," Chakotay hugged her back. "Tom took care of me."

Still embracing Chakotay, B'Elanna looked over at Tom. She knew. Of course she knew; even when Tom was telling her about what he and the Doctor had been dealing with, just listening to him, B'Elanna knew the old feelings were being brought back to the surface. And she wasn't mad. A wave of admiration came over her face as she looked at Tom, silently thanking him for keeping her oldest friend safe.

After B'Elanna finally released Chakotay, the three of them continued down the hall together, chatting.

"You were telling me the odds, Tom." Chakotay laughed. "You were calling it…what was it… 'Disaster in the Delta.'"

Both Tom and B'Elanna found Chakotay's hallucinatory boxing match extremely amusing. Chakotay didn't usually talk about his vision quests to anyone (either because of some Indian tradition, or his private personality, but probably a combination of the two). But laughing about it with Tom and B'Elanna seemed to make him feel better about it.

"But I wasn't even there?" B'Elanna exclaimed. "Not just the stands, or selling peanuts or anything?"

Chakotay shrugged. "Maybe you were and I just didn't see you."

"You know," B'Elanna held up a finger, "I told Chell, at one point, I didn't think locking you in a room with the Doctor for three days was the best way to restore your sanity."

"The Doctor," Chakotay's eyes rolled upward, with the memory. "If only you two could have seen the Doctor, in that vision quest."

"What was he doing?" B'Elanna asked.

Chakotay took a deep breath, blinking rapidly. "Well, he had a white lab coat for starters, like something out of one of Tom's mad scientist movies…"


End file.
